Friday, August 3, 2012

Elaine Hartnett: Winning the Game of Life

     I came back from Haiti to a different and unwelcome reality.  Elaine Hartnett, our upper school assistant principal who had been battling throat cancer for two years, had been rushed to the hospital in Delaware and was in dire straits.  Though she knew she was dying and had little time, she had journeyed with her husband to the family beach house in Bethany because it was there that she found comfort and peace--it was home.  She continued to struggle these last days and on last Tuesday evening she passed from this life to the next.
    To say she will be missed does not capture the void created by her passing among her family, friends, and the community of Our Lady of Mt. Carmel.  She had a big personality, a passion for all she did, a great love for young people and a fiercely competitive spirit.  These traits combined into the perfect person to deal with teens on a regular basis.  Our students loved her, respected her and were inspired by her.
      I love to remember best the early years we shared.  She joined us in 2000 as the new century began  after leaving a job in post-secondary education.  She said she wanted a job where she could form relationships with young people.  She felt that college kids did not connect in the same way as those a little younger.  Did I have the job for her!  It took me three dinners, lots of cajoling, and the promise of summers at the beach to convince her to join our Carmel venture.  Once she agreed to be our assistant principal, she plunged into the job full force.  During those pre-recession years, the school was growing in enrollment, initiating new curriculumm, and sending an increasing number of kids to college.  Elaine was often the force that enabled them to get to that point.  Her office provided  solace for the many needs of our students.  With her background in counseling, she was able to provide guidance and a kleenex for many broken hearted youngsters when their hearts were broken for the first time.  She gave out countless--and generally ugly--ties to young men who found themselves in a uniform crisis.  She gave good advice to kids who needed a confidence boost as well as space to those who just neeeded to vent.  She was the queen of "Let's make a Deal" and often bargained kids into changing bad habits, improving their attitude or just following the rules they did not like.  She was an expert at teasing kids into goodness and the most notable noise that came from her office was laughter.  She was not only a lover of life, she was a lover of kids and they could tell.
   She was the ultimate fan attending lots of school sporting events.  She knew the rules of the games and was challenging when kids gave up too easily.  She expected them to be tough, use their skills and never give up on themselves.  This competitive nature of hers  showed up in all kinds of ways.  Everything could be transformed into a competition--who could lose weight the fastest? who could get grades done first? who could make a quilt?  It was a joke in her family that a minor war could break out over a game of cards or the placement of a letter in a Scrabble competition.  It was this competitive nature, I think, that kept her fighting so long in her illness.  She did not doubt that she could get better and fought to do so.  I thought she would win too....
    We will celebrate her life on Monday at her funeral Mass.  I know that there will be an overflowing church with many young adults whose hearts she touched as they grew up in our school.  I know there will be faculty and friends as well as  many family members.  Perhaps all of those people are the "points" that Elaine earned in the game of life.  Each one of us was "earned" with a kind word, wise advice, a challenge or  a smile.  There is no comfort in attempting to figure out why suffering happens to good people or why someone so young and healthy gets such a terrible illness.  It just has to be given up as a mystery.  It is good, though, to think about what it takes to make ones' life well lived.  For Elaine, it was passion for all that she loved--people, kids, the beach, her family, and life itself.  She did not "go gentle" and she fought her best to stay.  In the end, that was not to be.  In the end, we are left with our memories of her--and good they are.  We are also left with the example she gave and the standard she set of what it takes to live a life that is worthy of the great gift that it is.  She has told us through her example--Live with passion.  Live with love.  Live with laughter.  Do not settle for second best.  Be your best.
    We will remember Elaine Hartnett in our hearts and maybe we can honor her by living with the energy, spirit, and passion she exemplified.  We have to try. 
    So, goodbye,dear friend...you will be missed.

Monday, July 23, 2012

An Alay Lakay

"The end is just the beginning." As we all sit together enjoying our last night in Haiti by reviewing what we have seen and done here, I can't help but think that this is just the beginning of something. I look around at all of us and know that we are going back to thoughts of a new school year. These blog entries have been just a piece of what I have experienced here. There have been extreme highs and extreme lows here, and it's important to be aware of both. It's important that people know what we have seen here. I came into this whole thing not knowing what to expect, and I get ready to leave not knowing what is next. There is certain work to be done that goes along with why we came here, but I leave here knowing that I don't know much about the world. I have good intentions to learn more about the world, and to see more of it, and to be more aware of it. ~~Ryan

We came as educators, we leave as friends. I have been blessed with the company of such diverse yet truly good people. As all of us return to create our Global Neighbor Schools we go with eyes  that now see differently.  What a wonderful gift to know that we have collegues in New York and Arizona who share this experience and enlitenment.  My hope is that we are able to connect and share in ways that will make a lasting impact on our students, faculty and school families showing that we are in fact all neighbors.

Missy

"An Alay Lakay" is the theme of the workshop we worked on this week.  It means Let's Go Home!  The focus is on the job of Catholic Relief Services in response to crisis and the development work that follows.  It is all about our responsibility to one another to help all people live a quality life which includes not only food, shelter and clean water but also a job, the ability to pursue one's dreams, be educated and live a life that allows us to develp the potential that is God's gift to us.  We all want that for ourselves, our childrena and for  those we love.  People who live in poverty have those same desires.  The road to achieve those dreams must seem very long.  As we get ready to go home tomorrow, I hope we can maintain the new perspective we have gained, remember the  inspiring people we met, and revel in the new friends we have made from Haiti and across our own country.  This week has been busy.  I think that my mind  and  heart have grown.  I can't wait to share all this with the Mt. Carmel kids, faculty and community that I love so much.  You won't believe the great ideas we have to share!  I could not have come to Haiti with a better team than Missy and Ryan.  I am grateful to both of them for all they have done and all they will do this year.  Right now, though, I am ready--Let's go home!

Last day in Les Cayes and back to Port Au Prince

I have so much to say about these last few days in Haiti. Les Cayes is much different from Port Au Prince. It's rural. It's full of greenery. It seems like a simple kind of life there. I had my first taste of lobster in Les Cayes, and swam in the ocean for the first time. These were personal highs for me. On the purpose of the trip I saw greatness as well. I saw more proud people from CRS, and their Haitian beneficiaries. From the rally post where women were learning to take care of their babies, to the mill being constructed to produce cassava flour the strides were visible. I have such a deep respect for these people for taking control of their own businesses and not just asking for more handouts.
The return to Port Au Prince only enhanced the progress we saw in Les Cayes. We went to see the palace and the cathedral, both destroyed by the earthquake. I immediately thought of the White House and how I would feel if it were destroyed.
---Ryan

A few years ago Bob and I traveled to Bermuda. Dozens of times I told him how “amazingly blue” the water was. I was mesmerized by its beauty. This little Caribbean of


Haiti has amazingly blue water too. On this journey I have been amazed and mesmerized not only of the island’s beauty but by other riches even more beautiful. Catholic Relief Services staff members are bright, dedicated people who give themselves whole heartedly to the task of healing Haiti’s people and the issue of poverty by emphasizing the dignity of the people whom they serve. They challenge all of us that healing and hope have to come from within the communities here. Their work and our work must be “ shoulder to shoulder” with the poor, giving them education to improve their own situation. One of our treks yesterday was to visit a school (which is not in session). Look at the photo and imagine four teachers in each row of desks in that room. They were there over the break to receive training to improve their skills and student’ understanding. We asked what they thought they needed most…the response was more materials .Everyone remember that when you are school shopping. I’m not saying go purchase material for them. I am saying a great way to be in solidarity with them is to realize what you have access to and appreciate it and to value the gift of education. An unexpected surprise was that I looked at the stenciling over top the black board as I left. I asked someone to translate it for me. It so wonderfully expresses faith of the people…”remember the eye of God is always on you.” No one seemed to be concerned that God played a key role in that public school. It seems they see Him as their partner.



Missy





I had to ask Ryan a few minutes ago what day it was!!! We have visited so many places and met so many people that it is beginning to meld together in my head and heart! We left Caritas today but before we did, two great memories were created. We all went to Mass and we were treated to a special luncheon by Fr. Pasquale. First of all the Mass—Imagine a full church with everyone dressed up…even hats on the ladies. Imagine the sound of tropical rain on a tin roof. Add to that the sounds of every voice singing and drums playing. The Mass was in Creole so I didn’t understand a word of it but what a great prayer it was! I wish our parishioners and students would raise such a joyous song. I saw all those prayerful people really celebrating but could not help but think what the rain was doing to their little homes---mud everywhere.

We had lunch before we left with Fr. Pasquale who has been in charge of the retreat center where we stayed but who will begin a new job in a few days. He will be in charge of all the schools in his diocese and will be working on teacher training and curriculum building. He has a Master’s Degree from a University in Paris so he really knows what he needs to do. He gave us a luncheon sendoff that was all home cooked Haitian and very delicious. The best part, though, was talking about the Church. We talked about the good the Church has done in Haiti, the new more conservative focus that is emerging, the hopes we all have for the coming years. Between that conversation and the Mass, I felt like I really had a better sense of the Church as universal….pretty cool!

We rode back to Port au Prince which was a four hour trek that was very bumpy and reminded me once again what happens when there is no infrastructure to take care of things like crumbling roads, rocks, and potholes! On the way back, we passed the palace of the president which had been damaged in the earthquake and will be rebuilt. It looked as though someone had lifted off the top of the building and set it back right next to where it belonged…We also passed the Cathedral which also needs to be totally rebuilt. You could still see how beautiful is was…perhaps it will be again. We heard the story of the bishop who perished there the night of the earthquake. While we were there, we got out of the car to take a few pictures and were overrun by people asking for money. The saddest part of it was that they were all very young mothers holding infants. They would hold out the baby and ask for money to care for them…How desperate does one have to be to use a tiny child as a tool to beg? It seems that in this country, everywhere you look there is a vision of despair and then just a minute later, one of hope. I have learned that if hope translates into reality, there needs to be connections and partnerships so that people like me remember how blessed are and understand the best ways to share.

 









Sunday, July 22, 2012

Saturday In Haiti

In Haiti people follow the sun instead of an alarm clock. That probably has something to do with the fact that there is no system of electric here. Those who have electric have generators and often, because they are so expensive, they turn them off most of the day. They go to bed early and rise with the sun. So, our days have begun early here. “Here” for the last few days is the Caritas Retreat Center outside Le Cayes. It is spacious and there is an air of hospitality. Certainly it is lovely with the scent of jasmine all around us from the plants that line the driveway. It is also really hot, hot, hot!


Today our team worked on developing the curriculum for the unit we are writing for CRS which is about emergency response. We spent time talking about the people we met over the last week—CRS staff and beneficiaries alike—and decided how to translate at least some of this experience for our colleagues who will teach the content without the benefit of this Haitian adventure. I think we made a good start on our plans and really focused on the process of improving the quality of life for people especially after a natural disaster like the earthquake was here. Certainly people need the basics—food, water, and shelter. In the long term they need just as intensely the ability to get a job, care for their children, and achieve a sense of independence which fosters self-worth. Many of these attributes are accomplished with the help of others within a community. I have been proud to discover that in Haiti one of the most important communities working to achieve a better quality of life is the Catholic Church here in Haiti. The Church often works with CRS on the process that is development. This process should continue until people are self-sufficient but sometimes it only continues until the funding disappears. (This issue is clearly one that must be addressed through advocacy efforts….soon!)

Our afternoon and evening was spent at a beach where we swam and ate. What a different Haiti that was from what we had been experiencing. The water was warm and turquoise blue, the meal was delicious, and the company grand. Meeting the other Catholic educators that are here from Arizona and New York has been a delight. They are kind, dedicated, and zoned in on the mission of their schools and the Church. I am proud to be in their company!....Kathy

A Friday In Haiti

Today was a very long day. We began about 7:00 with breakfast, then drove to the CRS office in Le Caye. We picked up our two guides for the day—a doctor and an agricultural manager--and proceeded to the “country.” It was a several hour trip that took us along beautiful coasts where the blue/green ocean lapped deserted shores. It also took us on winding almost non-existent roads and even through a partially dry riverbed. (I am very appreciative of Hondas at the moment and the drivers were nothing short of miracle workers.)

Our goal today was to see development in action. There were two programs that we saw that made a big impression. One was a program for new mothers in outlying areas. We went to what is called a Rally Point. There is a designated space in a local area where mothers and young children come once a month to have their babies weighed to insure they are growing and gaining weight. The babies are tracked until they are five. The moms are from the local area and form a Mother’s Club to support each other. From the CRS staff, they learn about the importance of breast feeding, good nutrition for moms and babies and other skills designed to make sure these children get a good start. Since this program began the mortality rate for both moms and infants has plummeted. The wonderful thing to see was how proud the moms were of their babies—and they were adorable—and how they really took what they learned to heart and used the new skills. They also formed a bond with each other which gives an extra added support structure.

The other program was agricultural and it too was run in a village by the Mother’s Club. We saw a sample garden that produced peppers and sweet potatoes which was planted to maximize the yield. The goal is to grow enough to feed the family and to have some extra to sell. This is really important because we learned earlier that Haiti does not have enough food for her people even counting all that is given as aide from the international community. The community leaders of this group were very vocal about what assistance they needed to succeed. At one point there was a conversation going on in Spanish between one of our delegation and the doctor who was accompanying us at the same time as the women were telling us about their project in Creole which was being translated into French and then translated into English by some CRS members! It is a small world after all!

The day ended with a dinner at a local restaurant with other CRS leaders who are in charge of the programs in the southern part of the country. We ate outside at the beach and enjoyed not only the atmosphere but listening to these young experts who are devoting their lives to improve the quality of life of the Haitians. The poverty is truly overwhelming and the infrastructure almost entirely absent, but these community based programs seem to not only inspire but succeed. We saw happy, healthy babies and a flourishing garden …not to mention hopeful people!


Day Three In Haiti

“We will not walk in front of them. We will not walk behind them. We will only walk with them.” Those were the words that were told to us by Kevin, who runs livelihood programs in Port-Au-Prince. The common theme we are hearing is that Haitians must rebuild Haiti, and in many ways the same principle can be adopted anywhere. Here Haitians are given the tools and training they need to get started in businesses, but must maintain these on their own. We met Anna yesterday who showed us her business. She makes hand stitched greeting cards like the one below. These are intricate works that she is very proud of. We met a baker who dreams of continuing his business to be able to supply prisons with bread. Talk about giving back. Not all of the people we’ve met have been as successful since leaving the camps. Two young people we’ve met stay at home all day since they have not completed school and cannot get jobs without this education. You may ask yourself why they just don’t go back to school. School in Haiti is very expensive and they cannot afford it without jobs, and can’t get jobs without education. My wheels are spinning with ideas to help these young people and Haiti in general.

Much is to be said about the people working for CRS as well. We’ve met Haitians and Americans that do the work here. They are just as proud of their work as the Haitians are proud of their benefits. I am looking forward to visiting programs in Les Cayes, a city on the southern coast of Haiti. --- Ryan
Wow! My head and my heart were very full yesterday as we ventured to 2 communities rebuilding with the guidance of CRS. The amazing people of CRS are so dedicated to the poor and vulnerable. The ideas generated are ingenious. We visited the community of Petitonville within Port au Prince and saw the progress of transitioning families into T shelters and WASH (Water and Sanitation Hygiene) programs. The most brilliant idea to me was encouraging and supporting Haitians do and entrepreneurship turning rubble into gravel or sand for latrines and bases for T shelters. The Good News shared here today was that several of the tent camps have been closed and the people have been moved into a somewhat safer environment. The poverty is overwhelming and heartbreaking here. Progress is slow. Funding runs low but, CRS brings hope!

We were invited to go to L’arch de ciel an orphanage for AIDS/HIV in the afternoon. It is considered to be a positive place of healing for them. This was so evident in the dignity and compassion shown by the founder Danielle. 17 young people from ages 3 to 20 greeted all of us with smiles and kisses .Before going to Le Cayes today we visited another community on recovery. We got to chat with two little boys with our limited French. They asked me about my children and “if my mother was living.” So sweet…
Count your blessings! Missy

I have always believed that the greatest resource that Our Lady of Mt. Carmel has are the people who make up the community. What I am discovering here in Haiti this week is that people might be the best resource of every community. CRS has a program that moves people from the point of needing direct assistance—food and shelter—right after an event like the earthquake to transitional housing which is safer and more permanent. They move back to their home neighborhoods and are given holistic training and skills to take the next step toward self sufficiency. They learn about finance, get psychological support, get start up money for their businesses, and form community associations. They have CRS mentors and many have begun to rebuild the economy here through this program. One of the people we met today is an example of the inspiring people who are moving this poverty stricken country forward. Richie is a young Haitian man who attended Boston College and graduated with a dual degree—Finance and Pre-Med. He got a job in Finance after graduation but decided he wanted to move back to Haiti to be with his family and perhaps start a business here. He came back to visit in January 2010….just in time to experience the earthquake. He used his medical skills in the early stages of the event and later teamed with Catholic Relief Services where he continues to work in a very poor neighborhood that literally crumbled that night in January. He is now assisting this neighborhood in rebuilding, regaining jobs, and getting the kids back into school. I cannot tell you how humble he was as he told his story nor how inspired I was to hear him. I kept thinking of the statement that Anne Frank wrote in her diary as I looked at the devastation and then at Kevin. It was something like...”Despite all this, I still believe that people are truly good at heart.”…..Kathy

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Can This Be Real?

There are hae been many times in my life that I have felt like I was in two realities but none like yesterday.  We went to visit some of the transitional housing that CRS made available to people in order to get them out of the tents after the earthquake.  This process has taken place over the last two years...the "houses" are very small--one room for a famiy of five--with outside latrines.  The people were so proud of these homes and so grateful for them.  What a stark vision as I thought about the hotel where we were stayng and my house back home.  The poverty is overhwhelming but the spirit of the people is so strong.
We visited an orphanage for children with HIV which is run by a Canadian couple who have spent their life in Haiti.  Perched on the side of a mountain this home for 40 some from three to twenty was a welcome respite.  With the addition of new drugs into their health care routine, these children not only have a healthy today, they have a future.
The tremendous contrasts continue.  On one hand there is dense population and poverty. On the other hand, people are starting to pick up their lives and make them better.  It has become clear to me that for many reasons from government to infra-structure, Haiti needs all the help possible to recover.  We continue to meet dedicated people from around the world who are giving talent and years of their lives to make this happen.  CRS is helping to start little business ventures with people and giving them the traiing to succeed  They work with the people rather than for them.  It takes lots of patience and to 'rebuild the Kingdom."  I guess we already knew that.
Ryan, Missy and I could not get on the internet last night so I write from the lobby early in the morning.  Later today we travel to the country--four hours to the south--where CRS has worked since 1954.  The adventure continues...pray that all this information we are getting turns into something helpful for our students.